Academically,
I consider those I used to love —
prodigies in toxicity,
overachievers in chaos,
PhD candidates in manipulation.

And yet,
they built me.
Not with kindness,
not with safety.

Every lie
sharpened my discernment.
Every gaslight
taught me to see in the dark.
Every hollow apology
made me fluent in silence.

And still,
I choose to love.
Not recklessly,
not blindly —
but with eyes open,
heart still willing.

to stay soft.

Stay squishy my friends.